Change and Fear

Recently, I was talking to a friend who started her own business 18 months ago. She dropped out of the “rat race” after years of working with little reward because she felt disenchanted and as if something was missing. Starting her own business wasn’t something she planned out and orchestrated, it came together while she was taking a sabbatical to re-energize herself. She wanted to find a way to be more involved in the things in life that bring her joy – pieces of her life and her soul that she put aside while climbing the corporate ladder. Now, she’s happy with her decision, her business is small and growing, and she is finding her niche in business consulting, writing, and online content management. However, two of her favorite parts of life have continued to take a backseat to her business life, and as a result, once the freshness of her new business wore off, she began to feel like something was, again, missing from life.

I hear stories like this all the time. We feel the need for change so we get a new job, take up a new hobby, move to a new area … but after the novelty wears off we are right back where we were before. In talking to clients and friends who have experienced this, it is often because they haven’t made the REAL change they desire. They did not truly follow their dream. In some cases, it turns out that they were not aware what their real dream(s) was – they had been living life on “autopilot” and never really stopped to identify what they most wanted in life. Other people were simply too scared to make the changes necessary to pursue the life they wanted. Unfortunately, it is impossible to achieve the life you desire if you don’t know what you want and/or are too scared to pursue it.

Tame Your Fear

Fear is an untrained pet. It romps around in our life creating a ruckus, making us run in circles, run the other way, or stand completely still. It takes patience and determination to tame our fears, and we can’t do it until we are truly ready to accept responsibility for them. Still, if you want to make a change in your life, you are likely going to have to overcome a fear of some type. When you do, though, the rewards are colossal.

There is a freedom that comes with pursuing your dreams and following your passion. And, that freedom opens you up to additional new opportunities and joys. So, if you have been feeling stuck, if the shine has worn off your last accomplishment, if you feel the need for a change in your life, but have been too scared to move forward – consider this:

 Is it scarier to move forward with your dreams, or to live numerous years doing the same things you are now?

As for my friend, with the New Year she started making time in her daily schedule to reconnect with one of her favorite hobbies and said she already feels better about herself and her life. As a result, she is more focused, happier, and healthier.  “It’s a start on the right path,” she said, “now, I don’t know how I ever lost my focus.”